167: An Abuse of the Terms “Father” and “Son”

As sons and daughters of God, one of the most wonderful truths we should embrace is that we can hear directly from our Father. Many Christians don’t realize this and think that only special men can hear from God.

I heard a teaching once in a leadership seminar based on the following scripture from Hebrews 3.

“Moses was faithful as a servant in all God’s house, testifying to what would be said in the future. But Christ is faithful as a son over God’s house.” (Hebrews 3:5-6)

This influential speaker taught on church leadership using the analogy of servants and sons in the house. Yet in the analogy, instead of teaching from the perspective of God being our Father and we being His sons, he likened the pastor of a church to the “father” and the leadership structure under him was made up of the “sons.” This teaching was a part of the broader perspective where the pastor of the church provides a “covering” for all those submitted under his leadership. Those who come out from under the “covering” are in rebellion to the “father of the house” and susceptible to attack from demonic forces. Here are notes from that seminar taken directly from the speaker’s comments (in the notes “father” refers to the pastor, “sons” refer to the leaders under him in the church structure):

God builds His kingdom relationally in families. There is a “father” and there are “sons.” In the same way, the pastor builds his house on sons.
Christ is a Son. He took a position, in attitude and spirit, subservient to the Father. In the same way, the sons in the house are subservient to the father of the house (the pastor).
The sons are faithful to the father’s work (the pastor) and hold the father’s heart and the success of his work as their own.
Sons bond new people to the family and to the father (the pastor). Sons have no agenda, but the agenda of the father (the pastor).
Sons share their inner conversations with their father (the pastor).
Sons can handle correction, discipline and change. If you are a pastor, the way you know if someone is with you is if they stay with you after correction.

Throughout the seminar the thread of control was woven in every teaching. If the “father of the house” said it, it was the truth. Anyone who disagreed was “in rebellion.”

There is certainly a place for teamwork and respect for the leadership roles in the local church. God gave some to be elders and deacons, and we have a common vision to share the Good News of the Gospel of Jesus Christ to the world in a strategic manner, as well as build up the local body of believers with encouragement, fellowship, and teaching. However, misapplications of Scripture and the use of the “father and son” relationship as an analogy for the relationship between a pastor and his staff is religion gone amuck! It’s a serious diversion from the biblical truth of our sonship. Because we are sons, we can talk to and hear directly from our Father, and any good pastor will make one of his main objectives raising up a mature congregation who knows the voice of the Lord. No one stands between us and God. We are no longer under the Old Covenant system where we are dependent on a priest to represent us before God or a prophet to speak for God to us. We have our own personal, intimate relationship as sons and daughters with our Father.

Sadly, many who have come out of abusive church situations will adapt an attitude that even though they love God, they don’t need church. There is a growing sentiment in Christianity: “I’m the church and you’re the church. We don’t need meetings or structure or pastors. Let’s just BE the church.” Abuse causes an anti-church attitude, but we need to remember that if we decide to ignore the portions of scripture that describe God’s intent for the local church, then we’re ignoring a part of the same Bible that tells us we are righteous, holy, redeemed, and loved.

In the New Covenant of grace, the first thing we need to know as sons of God is that our Father will never, ever, ever, ever break His covenant with us. We will forever be sons in His house and loved by Him. Once we know that, we’ll walk as sons and find it easy to serve one another in humility.

“God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made him head over all things for the benefit of the church.” (Ephesians 1:22, NLT)¹

(from pages 262-263 of Unveiling Jesus)

Want more from Tricia Gunn? Check out excerpts from the Unveiling Jesus 20-part series!

Unveiling Jesus, by Tricia Gunn, is a verse by verse study of the pure gospel of grace. It’s an amazing journey of love, identity, and freedom in Christ.

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¹Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright ©1996, 2004, 2007, 2013 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.